Thursday, February 18, 2010

A Week in Review: my unasked for opinions about Ash Wednesday and Stuff

We seem to be on the tail end of the Binghamton Plague/Crud. Four out of seven of us got it which isn't too bad. There is a huge pile of laundry and other cleaning to be got through. And we missed three days of school work because I couldn't move. And I had to muddle through Ash Wednesday services on my own because Matt was too sick to move.

Don't think I completely blew it but don't recall ever having done the service myself before and so was constantly being taken by surprise (I must always be dancing at the back with a baby instead of paying actual attention). Like that long moment of silence before the distribution of ashes, wish the Prayer Book would specify how long its supposed to be. Knew, of course, that I was supposed to be praying but was too nervous to actually pray (thought I might be over come by the Holy Spirit and forget to stop). Tried counting to 100 but got lost in the middle.

And then the different absolution prayer--gasp. Completely mangled the words both times. And then was frankly annoyed with the short litany. For whomever is revising the Prayer Book it needs to be seriously beefed up--too much 'I'm really sorry for being frustrated and angry with myself' and not enough 'I'm really sorry for actually committing real sin; please God, don't strike me'.

I didn't intend this post to be entirely liturgical. But I've been gently dipping my toes back into the working pool of church since this last baby and have discovered three things.
1. I really love being up in the thick of things with Matt.
2. I don't much love doing it by myself.
3. I'm immoderately attached to this latest baby. I'm not what you could call a 'clingy mother'. I should probably more clingy, But, I'm totally bewitched by this baby. In fact, I sometimes pretend to carry on feeding her when she's actually gone to sleep so that I don't have to put her down and move on to the next thing.

And speaking of the next thing, I shouldn't be sitting her blogging when there's such a mountain of laundry and school.
ps. I'm making free to blog as much as I want because I've finished my part of the next installment (Leaving Home) and Matt's the one that's holding things up.

1 comment:

Former Atheist said...

Sometimes I think all children should be the 3rd or 4th or 5th born. I think I'm a much nicer mom to the 3rd child in my house because I'm much less stressed out over silly things. I was so focused on doing things "right" according to the Christian parenting models that I too often missed my kids' charms.